[00:00:00] Wayne Schwass: Hello and welcome to the Thrive Podcast series. I'm your host, Wayne Schwass. Thrive is Monash Health's employee mental health and wellbeing program created for our people by our people. Our bespoke program explores the themes of validating that working in healthcare is uniquely challenging, normalising the conversation about mental health, encouraging pause for rest, reflection and regeneration, and creating safe spaces that empower our people to speak up.
[00:00:32] In this series, we talk with some of our people about what this means for them through storytelling and their shared experiences in the hope that that may be helpful to others. In today's episode, I sit down with Rebecca McKinley Food Services Assistant to discuss the importance of looking after our own wellbeing while balancing day-to-day challenges.
[00:00:52] I hope you enjoy the episode. What are some of the day-to-day challenges that employees might face at work? Rebecca, in your [00:01:00] experience?
[00:01:01] Rebecca Mckinley: Because what we do is all based around the patients. Um, the biggest challenge is your patient load, which you're not gonna know from until you step onto the floor what's going on.
[00:01:12] You obviously have to respond to the need and what the day. Lies out for you, um, from ev every day. You never know what you are walking into. It can be overwhelming, but I think that same with everything. You have to remember that the only things you can control is how you respond to what's put in front of you.
[00:01:35] Um, and one thing at a time when, when none of us are superhuman, we can't do more than we are capable of. It's just, you know, keeping a strong mindset and staying focused on what needs to be done.
[00:01:46] Wayne Schwass: So how do you. Prepare for a day or a shift when it's so much unpredictability.
[00:01:53] Rebecca Mckinley: Again, I think being clear on your priorities of what you're doing and why you're doing it.
[00:01:59] Um, [00:02:00] it's about the patients, um, that are there on the day and they're the ones that you need to be focusing on, on meeting their needs. Um, some patients are gonna need more. Some patients are gonna need less. Um, you just have to go into every day with, with the, the clear mindset, and again, knowing that the only thing you can control is how you respond to what's put in front of you, um, and being positive.
[00:02:25] Wayne Schwass: How important is it, Rebecca, in your experience for you to have an ability of looking after yourself and, uh, taking care of yourself? So that you can fulfill all of the obligations that you've got both at work, but also in your personal life. Because sometimes the risk can be, the focus is is almost exclusively on other people and we are not as good or we're not as consistent in sometimes turning that focus back on ourselves to go.
[00:02:57] How, hang on a minute here. How, how am I actually [00:03:00] coping? And if I'm not coping, okay, what do I need to do to self-correct? We can't pour from an empty
[00:03:04] Rebecca Mckinley: cup. Um, you need to, obviously there needs to be time. You need to create time to focus on the fact that sometimes your cup needs filling, and if that means going to bed early.
[00:03:18] Spending a bit more quality time with the things that are important to you, your family, your children, hobbies, your, the, your interests outside of work. You, you must make time for that. Um, you've gotta force yourself to make time for that because otherwise you're gonna end up burnt out and you'd be no good to anybody.
[00:03:37] I think for myself. I, I try and focus on my priorities in life. Um, work's important and I enjoy my job, but my overall priorities and the things that come first is my family and my children. If I'm not meeting their needs, then I'm gonna feel less than anything because they're the [00:04:00] most important priority in my life.
[00:04:02] Um, for me to meet their needs, I need to have something to give. So if it means taking time out, going for a walk, having a two hour conversation with a friend to vent to get your, your mind clear, having that conversation with your partner to get your mind clear, going bed early, having a bath, having, having a shower, and just disconnecting from everybody occasionally, then it, it has to be done, it does fly in the face of.
[00:04:34] The general healthcare worker is focused on other people, but whether it's the, the lesson I've learned from being a mother, um, you can't give if you don't have anything to give.
[00:04:45] Wayne Schwass: What strikes me, um, about you, Rebecca, is that you are naturally somebody who would, and correct me if I'm wrong here, but you default to the caregiver role.
[00:04:55] You're very giving of yourself. You've just talked about it quite [00:05:00] explicitly with. Your family, your husband, and your two daughters, but that extends in the role that you fulfill within Monash Health. So my question to that and that, that's admirable, by the way, my question to that is, who does that for you though?
[00:05:15] Look, I'm
[00:05:16] Rebecca Mckinley: very fortunate that I have an incredibly supportive husband, um, who probably sees the cracks. Me before I do and does take on extra load in the household when need comes about. If I am, it's gonna be too much for me to go and pick my daughter up from school, for example. He'll just finish work early and go and get her.
[00:05:43] Like I, I think it's, it's a, every balance in any household's gonna be different, but I think you need to lean on into the resources that you've got available to you. Sometimes it might be your parents, your, your siblings. Um, you know, it, it does [00:06:00] take the old adage, it does take a bit of a village to, um, maintain all our responsibilities.
[00:06:06] Um, and it's okay to accept that help from people. None of us are completely concrete. Solo anchors are able to do everything ourselves. Um, I think sometimes we put that expectation on ourselves. It's not necessarily other people putting that expectation on us. Sometimes we can do everything and we feel invincible and we feel like we can do everything, and that's great.
[00:06:32] Lean into that when that happens, but when the times come that you don't feel that, that's actually okay. It doesn't make you less than, I think it actually makes you more than if you're able to, um, recognise that in yourself. So
[00:06:46] Wayne Schwass: you, as somebody who is to me, seems very deliberate in what you are doing to fulfill your professional and personal responsibilities and relationships, but also you've got a level of self-awareness to [00:07:00] recognise and then prioritise the things that you need to do, which you know are helpful for you.
[00:07:05] But there might be people that will listen to this conversation, Rebecca, at some point, and they're really struggling or grappling with, how do I start, what do I do to prioritise my mental health, especially when I'm trying to manage and balance the competing priorities and the tension within healthcare, which is, you know, the workloads, competing priorities, deadlines, sometimes the urgency of a certain situation.
[00:07:28] As well as the emotional burden that people in healthcare carry, what would, what would your response, or what would your answer or suggestion be to anybody who might be in that position? If you're in a, in
[00:07:38] Rebecca Mckinley: a position where you're feeling overwhelmed and you're feeling torn and almost shredded by the pool of all these different things that an expectations that you need to meet.
[00:07:48] It's like any. Any situation you need to take stock, just pause. Instead of getting yourself into a, a sweaty LA [00:08:00] and achieving nothing because you're in a panic mode. You are, you know, in, in fight or flight mode basically. And just trying to survive. Just, just stop, stop and, and reassess what is it you're doing, and.
[00:08:14] Why, what, what, what are the important things that are driving you to do what you're doing? Be it career or personal? Um, we all have a, a list. We might not think about it, but we actually do create a list mentally of the things that are important to us. If you don't have children, it could be your dog, it could be your career, it could be.
[00:08:37] Your mom. It could be, you know, spending time with your niece or nephew. It could be any number of things, but sort that list and those things that are at the top of that list. They're the things that you really don't wanna let down, and then you can kind of separate and those extra things towards the, the middle to bottom of that [00:09:00] list.
[00:09:00] You have to recognise that that's actually chatter. And you have to clear the chatter a little bit to focus on the things that are important because if you are not meeting the needs of those really important things and those things that I call them, the not, not negotiables, um, meeting the needs of my, my children is not negotiable.
[00:09:19] I. Um, I'm very well known at work for taking on extra shifts and doing the extra and staying back and all those things, and I will do that willingly. But if some, a request like that comes at a time when I've already made a commitment to one of my children in particular, um, to be somewhere. Then that's actually not negotiable and that is where I will personally draw the line and say, look, I would love to, I'm really sorry, but I have another commitment that I can't, I can't let down.
[00:09:51] Wayne Schwass: I think there's so much in that answer. I mean, you've just, you've offered up a range of different practical strategies or techniques or tools that people could use. But the last thing that you've [00:10:00] just said there really resonated because it talks to boundary. You understand what is important to you as an individual, as a mom, as a wife, but also in your professional sense.
[00:10:11] You also mentioned pause, which I think is a really important word. Um, and I wanna unpack that a little bit more with you, Rebecca. How, how could you, or what would you suggest to people that might be finding it difficult to pause or find time in a very busy, chaotic, sometimes life, uh, to find space? For difficult conversations, but also checking in with yourself or other people that you're concerned about.
[00:10:35] It's a hard one because
[00:10:36] Rebecca Mckinley: life is so busy. Um, sometimes you, we can find that pause when we walk around the supermarket doing our groceries when we're in the car driving to and from work. Um, I think that there's real value in that dead time. Which is not dead time because our minds don't turn off. Um, [00:11:00] we, we can do those robotic movements of grocery shopping, shopping vegetables, driving the car.
[00:11:08] We can do those things with our minds still racing. I think myself personally, that's when I do a lot of my, my probably deepest thinking is when I'm preoccupied. With a robotic movement, um, that time's valuable. That's actually your own time with your own mind. Just mental pause. You know, it doesn't have to be physical pause sometimes, you know, removing yourself from the environment, um, that you're in when everything's busy, it's not always an option, you know, but that, you know, some of us have the, the most brilliant thoughts when we're having a shower.
[00:11:41] Because that's that pause moment where you can actually listen to your own thoughts a little bit and let your mind go to places that it doesn't always,
[00:11:50] Wayne Schwass: there's so much goodness in the things that you're sharing. And I, I loved, I loved your, uh, analogy about robotic activities or whatever it is that you're doing.[00:12:00]
[00:12:00] And I would, I would extend that a little bit further by we consciously or subconsciously choose what we choose to do with the available time that we have. Yes. So I think sometimes we default till we don't have enough time, but the little pockets of opportunity. Coffee break, ducking outside to have a 15 minute break, to have something to eat, as opposed to sitting at your desk in the sh in the shower, driving the car.
[00:12:26] You're stuck at a set of traffic lights or you're waiting for a coffee. Don't flip your phone out. Just keep the phone in your pocket or your bag and just. Focus on your breathing or think about something that is important or creative to you as opposed to defaulting to a phone, which is a distraction and that soaks up and sucks up the time.
[00:12:46] So I think that, I think that that's just beautiful, salient, um, advice that you've offered up from a leader's perspective. Rebecca, how can leaders role model, I was about to say good life, a [00:13:00] work life balance, but let me rephrase that. More harmony between our professional and our personal lives
[00:13:06] Rebecca Mckinley: by showing that they also have boundaries and that they also draw the line.
[00:13:12] You know, if I think if we see our leadership team just go, go, go constantly, and. They, they're setting that example that we will take that on as thinking that that's what they expect from us. Nine times out of 10, it's actually not what they expect from us. Um, that that's probably the expectation they have on themselves, or possibly we are not actually seeing the times that they take pause or the times that they.
[00:13:38] You know, set those boundaries. But if our leaders can show us that they're taking a personal day, they've actually booked three days leave because they need a break, that they're finishing work early because their child has a concert after school. I. Um, that shows to everybody else that it's actually okay.
[00:13:59] I, [00:14:00] I could do that too. You know, my child has something coming up that I really want to go to. I had thought I wouldn't be able to, but now I've just seen my manager finish early for a similar thing. I now feel more confident to ask and say, well, I would actually really like to finish early on a particular day for X reason.
[00:14:20] Um, example is so important, so important you can, words don't hold that much weight. It's actions I. That, that hold the weight.
[00:14:29] Wayne Schwass: That is a powerful thing that you've shared. Not only, you know, you don't have to be a leader to be a leader. We are leading ourselves and what we choose to do for ourselves. What do you look for Rebecca at work and how do you respond if you notice something in someone that you care about, that you work with and you're a little concerned about them?
[00:14:49] Rebecca Mckinley: I'm not backwards in coming forwards. Um, if I, if I notice that the energy of, of a particular staff member, someone that I see very [00:15:00] regularly isn't right, their sparks a bit dull, I'll ask the question. Are you, is everything okay? Are you okay? You, you, your sparks missing today. Um, you're looking a bit flat.
[00:15:13] Is everything okay? It's a very small question. And sometimes that can open up to a, oh yeah, look, I'm fine. I just didn't get much sleep or, yeah, I've got a few things on my mind. My dog's sick, my mom's in hospital. Um, I just haven't been feeling well. Just that little, little question. Just gives that person the, the, the feeling of being seen and they, that then gives them the opportunity to be heard and possibly validated.
[00:15:42] Um, and maybe a little conversation with, with someone else make, will make them go, well, okay, you're right. Maybe it shows, you know, if you're not feeling well, maybe you should have taken, do you want maybe, you know, can you take a day off tomorrow? Do you need, do you need some rest?
[00:15:59] Wayne Schwass: You [00:16:00] need some extra support.
[00:16:01] I think the, the simplicity of your question is just beau just beautiful and I mean this, um, really seriously, because are you okay? Is everything all right? You don't seem to have your normal spark. That's a, as Kaath Jeffries, the Director of Health, safety and Wellbeing with Monash Health, she was our first guest on this podcast series.
[00:16:23] She termed it so beautifully, and I think what you've just described is very similar. Quiet inquiry. Are you okay? Is everything all right? You don't seem to have your normal spark is a very different opening for a conversation to you are this, you are that. I've noticed this. That's very direct. That's closed-ended, whereas that simple, are you okay?
[00:16:45] Question. Just invites the person you're asking it to, to think about what they'd like to share with you. And that's as easy as it as it needs to be.
[00:16:55] Rebecca Mckinley: And it may just be that they've got something on their mind that they need to share [00:17:00] to get off their chest, to clear their thoughts. Maybe they've allowed some small thing to consume their mind and not realised that it's actually showing.
[00:17:10] As, as clearly as it is you, you're inviting pause for that person.
[00:17:15] Wayne Schwass: Yeah, but it also, I think it also eliminates some ambiguity because human beings, we're all guilty of it. Rebecca, we, we, we assume we make judgements based on what we think is going on. If I'm off and you ask me, is everything okay? I could turn around to you and go, look, I've had a really bad sleep.
[00:17:29] I'm tired and I'm grumpy. That gives you context so you can then make decisions about, okay, well how do I support Wayne in this situation? Exactly. I, I, I think the question is really powerful. It's, it's really simple and it opens up the conversation. Two more questions. I could talk to you all, talk with you all day, Rebecca, by the way.
[00:17:47] Um, and I don't think you'd have a problem with that. Two final No, no. I, two final questions. I'm known for chat. No, but that's that. This is the importance of the podcast series. It's about normalising the conversations. There are two important questions I'd like to finish [00:18:00] on. The first one is. If today was the first day that you will walk in to work with Monash Health, what advice would you offer yourself?
[00:18:10] Go at everything with,
[00:18:11] Rebecca Mckinley: with, with your best. Try your best. Be open, kind, communicate with the people around you. Try and make some connections, um, with staff members. Just the people that you, um, interact with across the course of your shift. You never know where it's gonna take
[00:18:31] Wayne Schwass: you. And the final question, and I ask all of the guests the same question, what's the best thing about working with Monash Health?
[00:18:38] Rebecca Mckinley: I actually, I've, I've, it's a hard one because I do really love my job and I love working for Monash Health. I have no intention. I, I joke that, and I, I joke seriously that this will be my last job. I have. I intend to retire from Monash, I'd have no intention of going anywhere else. Um, I think the, [00:19:00] the connections that you can make with your, your colleagues and your, and other staff, and not necessarily in your own department, but across disciplines, um, you're exposed to so many different people.
[00:19:12] I feel supported. At Monash, um, not nece, and not just by my own management team and coworkers, but the staff that I work with on the ward, be they, nurses, doctors, allied health, admin, um, uh, it's a real team type of environment and it's safe. You don't have to be everything. You know, it's, it's okay to not be at your best.
[00:19:41] The odd day, if you're tired or you run down or you're preoccupied, um, you've got a team around you. There's, there's people that you can talk to. There's people that will support you. There's people that will give you grace when you are not on your game. It's a beautiful way to
[00:19:55] Wayne Schwass: finish a great conversation.
[00:19:57] Thank you. Thank you. [00:20:00] Hey, thanks for listening. We hope that you found something in this episode that helps you reflect on your mental health and wellbeing, and importantly, our culture of care for our people. Don't forget, you can join us for our next episode where we explore how courage and confidence are the essential elements in initiating and leading conversations about mental health and wellbeing.
[00:20:18] We look forward to seeing you again soon.
[00:20:23] I.
